The Crestview Area Chamber of Commerce’s Awards and Installation Dinner on Saturday, first, allowed us to welcome Alicia Booker as the local business advocate’s new president.

Second, it allowed us to celebrate true leaders whose extraordinary community involvement ensures the Crestview area prospers.

Third, it offered a rare moment for business leaders to gather, network and enjoy a meal with lively entertainment – thanks to Jones & Company and Saundra Daggs and Friends – in a completely transformed Crestview Community Center that related the swanky “Lights! Camera! Action!” theme.

But it’s funny how some people — yours truly included — can dwell on the smallest things.

The day before the big event, our ad department and I looked at photos from last year’s dinner, wondering what to wear.

In good faith, I traveled to Mary Esther that night to shop: head to toe would be all new; it was too important an occasion.

Yet, somehow, despite good faith efforts, I failed. This realization came immediately upon entering the Community Center. Noticing the sea of black and white, head to toe, and feeling half-right: black and white, waist up and ankles down, but shameful, unspeakable khakis in between.

In my defense, there were plenty of khakis in the photos from last year’s event. However, I should have known better: with a different theme comes different attire.

Then, I heard Mom’s voice in my head: “You look like a hobo.” (Not the good, Laurel Hill kind, either!) It’s an expression I took exception to; I’ve always believed no one should be slighted for things they can’t change. (In this case, hobos.)

Still, I thought, “You couldn’t even follow simple instructions. The invitation clearly said black and white affair. Photos from last year’s Mardi Gras themed event do not negate that."

“You own black pants. Why didn’t you just put on black pants? They would have looked great with the new jacket.”

Yours truly, usually etiquette conscious (to a fault), was internally anxious while smiling and saying hello to Mayor David Cadle and past chamber president Dennis Mitchell, among others.

While more people arrived, I was bolted to the chair.

Suddenly, a voice: “Thomas, aren’t you having anything to drink?” a co-worker asks.

I confessed the faux pas to seven other News Bulletin associates at our table. For me, it wasn’t about the fashion. It was about an egregious blunder. In such social situations, a lack of conformity signals possibility of anarchy. Not following attire to the letter suggests being up to no good — at least, that’s the mindset with which I was raised, yet that certainly was not the intended message.

So no, I wasn't going to rise from the chair and reveal the awful truth — even if my life depended on that glass of water.

Of course, this crisis was anything but, and there was at least one other guest in khakis. (I counted.) And the chamber staffers smiled and were kind as usual.

However, we all have idiosyncrasies, and keeping a low profile — not standing out — is mine. This column has never been about me; it's always been more about life lessons or advice that can benefit the greater good. Writing it is part of my job description, and it has been a therapeutic experience. Still, working behind the scenes — like the Wizard of Oz: “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain” — also would suit me just fine.

Well, the idiosyncrasies kicked into overdrive Saturday night.

 “Maybe they’ll think I’m trying to stand out.” (That would be the biggest poker face ever.)

“Maybe I’ll be a trend setter.” (Not likely. I'm really fond of buttoning the top button on golf shirts, but friends have given me the side eye for it.)

“Maybe they’ll think the black pants were accidentally ruined just before the event.” (That’s realistic…)

Of course, none of that mattered. I’m a stickler for business and personal etiquette, but also can put things into perspective. The anxiety lasted a long 15 minutes. But with the awards presentations and Booker’s installation, it melted away. I happily stood up to applaud Citizen of the Year Rae Schwartz — who serves the community in countless ways with the Boy Scouts, Friends of the Library, arts and culture activities and in the knitting and crocheting group, to name just a few — and other inspiring people I’ve grown to know and admire.

Standing up to applaud them was all that mattered. This was their time to shine. It's like a familiar prayer, "Let me decrease, Lord, so that you will increase."  

We must never lose focus of what really matters in life.

On that note, it's nice to see residents help raise funds to revive the Crestview Police Department's K-9 unit, and to read about how Disney's "Frozen" inspired Troop 676 Girl Scouts to help the Waterfront Rescue Mission.

It reminds me of another saying of Mom's: "The world doesn’t revolve around you.”

What's your view? Write a letter to the editor or tweet News Bulletin Editor Thomas Boni @cnbeditor.

This article originally appeared on Crestview News Bulletin: EDITOR’S DESK: Focusing on what really matters

Sunday, we will celebrate Father's Day, which means something different for everybody, depending on your situation.

Many residents will spend the day with Dad, enjoying lunch, playing catch, going fishing, giving gag gifts — like the inevitable awful necktie — or maybe heading to Big Kahuna's or enjoying the beach.

Of course, kids will squeeze in those three little words often lost in the day-to-day rush: "I love you."

Some residents will visit Dad in the nursing home or hospital, reminding him that a father is always a father, and nothing's changed despite declining physical or mental health.

Some, including Sports Editor Randy Dickson and me, will reflect on treasured memories since our fathers died much too soon.

Still others will mourn never having a father, or a father figure, to begin with.

Holidays like Father's Day bring a range of emotions, thoughts and questions that far surpass canned sentiments on typical greeting cards.

Need to nurture

I wonder whether my father would be proud of me today; whether I will ever earn the kind of respect and prominence he had in my native Baldwin County, Ala.; and whether I'm the man I want to be since I lacked his leadership in crucial times. (Oct. 11 will be 15 years without him.)

At 31 years old, I wonder whether I want to be a father. It was a given decades ago — for instance, in Vacation Bible School, I was an 11-year-old who preferred mentoring the 6- and 7-year-olds over hanging out with kids my own age.

That need to teach and nurture has always been present, but a lot has changed since then.

For one thing, I've been an unrepentant workaholic for nine years. I take pride in producing quality newspaper products, and aim to bring the same high standards to our social media channels and video lines. However, you know the expression, "jack of all trades, master of none?" By trade, I have to wear many hats, so I just overdo it, working Sunday through Saturday on all our platforms to disprove that saying. (Don't worry; just a few hours each weekend.) The point is, no CNB property, for the most part, gets the redheaded stepchild treatment.

Of course, giving that kind of attention to your work life pretty much kills your personal life. Don't get me wrong, I agree with near-centenarian Vera Harold Owen's sentiment, "Hard work might hurt you, but it sure won't kill you."

And I love my career, volunteering and networking, but realistically, even these things aren't holding me back from a deeper relationship and building a family.

It's all about priorities. And, in my case, concerns.

A world of hurt

The world is increasingly divided, vulgar and less polite, it seems.

Who cares about someone's political leanings or faith? People should learn to co-exist, and try to find the goodness in everybody. Of course, talk radio, cable news and even the Crestview Bulletin's Facebook comments show us it doesn't always happen that way.

How can someone send a child into a world where there's always a derogatory term for "the opposition"? The ultimate goal always should be peace. And no issue is so important that it should cause strife.

Who wants a daughter to be heartbroken by some porn-addicted boy who doesn't know how to truly respect a woman, and himself? (Especially when so-called family sitcoms and dramas include nudity, toilet humor and make light of serious issues without considering the impacts on health and psychology, and how it affects viewers. Call me nostalgic, but family entertainment these days ain't the squeaky clean, ABC/TGIF "Family Matters" and "Full House" of the 1990s.)

Such concerns, for years, have made my priority for family go down, down, down. After all, you would want your children to be happy and, while I see opportunities for happiness, there's also a whole world of hurt out there. A world I often believed in and, like almost everyone else, accepted as the way things are before realizing status quo doesn't equal right.

'Friendship' ride

Perhaps it's a moot point. With my filled schedule, it's difficult to meet marriage-minded women. (Oh, I tried eHarmony, Match, Plenty Of Fish, Catholic Match, Zoosk and the list goes on and on and on.) If they were marriage-minded, they were incompatible, only wanted someone in uniform — God bless our military, but in the dating world, that doesn't help us office dwellers who lack tattoos and camo — were too rugged (nope, not into mudding or four-wheelers) or they were too picky and wanted to pick me to pieces.

It's a two-way street, of course. Preconceived notions work both ways, but there was too much drama and not enough time to sort it all out. It was a desire, but wasn't a priority.

A friend and I always joke (and even talk seriously) about marrying and having children together. But she's in Mobile, Ala., and I'm in Crestview. We dated three years ago and enjoy spending time together (we talk on the phone daily but actually see each other every other week; sometimes, once a month). It's tough, but it's also good, because she's also a workaholic and stays active with church activities, and we don't label our relationship. (Her Valentine's Day card to me said, "Have enjoyed our 'friendship' ride this far. Here's to many more!")

However, this Father's Day, all those familiar questions will haunt me.

Several small voices, for another year, will cause me to wonder whether nature's calling or Disney, happily-ever-after movies are manipulating my consciousness, whether I'm ready to accept my vocation of marriage and family or wanting to change those question marks into periods and face finality.

Spiritual fathers

Amid all this, something my brother, Frederick, a Catholic priest, says, is comforting.

"We are all spiritual fathers," he says, referring to every man's capacity to guide our community's children on a dignified path; whether that's indirectly through example, or directly through mentorship. (The counterpart is a spiritual mother who can watch out for all the world's children.)

In that sense, fatherhood doesn't seem so frightening.

Regardless of how you earned the title, Happy Father's Day. And check out our Father's Day photo pages! The first appears in the June 11-13 edition (on racks at these locations) and the second set of photos runs in the June 14-17 edition.

What's your view? Email News Bulletin Editor Thomas Boni, tboni@crestviewbulletin.com, or tweet @cnbeditor.

This article originally appeared on Crestview News Bulletin: EDITOR’S DESK: This Sunday, all men are fathers

When we received a Facebook message from Amy Forehand about her widely viewed Vine account, it seemed like an opportunity to let our readers know about a local video blog that was gaining the public's attention.

Plus, Taz, Gup, Bitsy and Caesar were pretty much the cutest things I'd seen all week, and I believed our readers would enjoy their story.  

But after reviewing reporter Matthew Brown's story, I realized this was much more than a cute-dogs story. It was a trend story — which, as everyone in the newsroom knows, is one of my favorite kinds of stories!

Amy's story shows the power of social media. Basically, cute dogs plus lots of clicks equals great exposure and increases the chances of business opportunities.

That's all it took — posting six-second video clips on her "Four Florida Pugs" website — for Amy to get a one-year endorsement deal with GetPetBox.com.

And with that deal in the can, I believe more opportunities are on the horizon.

Yes, in many ways, social media separates us more than ever. A Facebook friend often isn't even someone you can trust, let alone have a cup of coffee with. (Oh, yes; I use those privacy features and offer restricted wall access in those cases.) And I could write a lot about that topic. (For now, though, just click here for a powerful viral video on social media's separation.)

Despite its flaws, social media like Facebook and Twitter actually can bring some groups closer together.

For instance, I tweet mostly North Okaloosa news and commentary, but sometimes I'll throw out something about a TV show I'm watching. It's the only Twitter account I have, after all! Plus, all work and no play… as they say!

Anyway, a few weeks ago, I happened to listen to USA's new female-buddy comedy "Playing House." (I was assembling a new patio table and needed background noise; that's just how I operate!) It's not something I'd normally watch, but the writing and acting were sharp, so I tweeted that sentiment, tagged stars Lennon Parham and Jessica St. Clair and, what do you know, Lennon retweeted and favorited my tweet.

The same day, I was chatting with Panama City News Herald Managing Editor Will Glover about NBC's "About a Boy" (again, a show I never watched, but which served as background noise while working on another home improvement project). I tagged actress and star Minnie Driver, and she favorited my tweet!

And yes, the same day, I tagged Dublin's lord mayor in tweets about two Irishmen radio personalities' recent visit to Crestview while they spent time with their friend, Mary Gadeken, from Baker. And he retweeted me!  

Before social media, there wasn't that instant interaction with famous, busy or otherwise less accessible people. (And that's also true for round-the-clock-workin' newspaper editors; readers tweet me all the time; in fact, a couple of weeks ago, one reader didn't get her weekend edition and I tweeted her a message to expect me at her house soon, 'cause I'm delivering!)

We're all interconnected in a way we haven't been before, and that's made business opportunities crop up for people who otherwise would have taken the long road to success.

Justin Bieber is one success story — depending on your point of view — after being discovered from YouTube videos. And more and more actors are investing in professional studio equipment and making home-based businesses with just a few hours' effort each week.

All you need is a large following and an ad-supported model.

Who knows, Amy Forehand could be well on her way to similar success.

And since we're going to tag Ellen DeGeneres when we tweet this story to our online readers, we won't be too surprised if we see Amy's dream come true and she shows up on daytime television in the near future.

What's your view? Email tboni@crestviewbulletin.com or tweet @cnbeditor.

This article originally appeared on Crestview News Bulletin: EDITOR'S DESK: These days, all you need are followers (VIDEO)

Despite all the communication arts courses I took that suggested otherwise, I've always believed mass communications, particularly television and movies, can affect human behavior.

After all, in language, why else would slang or certain affectations catch on; in fashion, why else would something become stylish; and why does celebrity culture exist? (Teenage girls don't scream and lose their senses when a homegrown band plays at the small-town festival, that's for sure!)

It's difficult to count all the rap or country songs I've heard that suggest paycheck day means blow-it-all-in-one-day.

Nicki Minaj: "I'ma blow all my money and don't give two (redacted)." Toby Keith: "But I just punched out and it's paycheck Friday … I'm gonna get drunk and be somebody." (That one really sounds like peer pressure; you're not somebody unless you're wasting your cash and drunk.) 

It's insulting.

Like the Michael Jackson hologram during Sunday night's "Billboard Music Awards." ("Slave to the Rhythm," the song played, is an eerily accurate title. The king of pop can't rest in peace, even in death.)

Or like a newspaper magnate's spoiled son asking an out-of-work black journalist to be his paid, live-in toy. (OK, I wrote this column while watching the 1982 Richard Pryor film, "The Toy." I will truly watch any film with the slightest journalism angle. What an inappropriate premise!)

Well, I'm happy to report, a number of Crestview residents get it. They know the value of hard work, enjoying the fruits of their labor and forecasting a healthy financial future because of it. 

They're tending to more than 30 reserved plots at the Common Ground Community Garden, according to Catherine Ward, the nonprofit's organizer. I enjoyed meeting this visionary and listening to her presentation Thursday during the Crestview Area Chamber of Commerce's Professional and Inspired Leaders of Tomorrow meeting.

The downtown garden comes at time when DIY — or do it yourself — is in demand. We've heard you can't have your cake and eat it, too. But DIYers who build their own luxurious furniture, create their home's artwork or cook, instead of eat out so often, do just that; they save money but still live comfortably.

Promoting self-reliance and resilience are Common Ground's objectives, and they extend beyond gardening, Ward said. Avoiding dependence on the government, paying in cash as opposed to a credit card and being a survivor, not a victim, make people self-sufficient.

And the more you can depend on yourself, the more others can depend on you, and the more the community thrives.

Makes sense to me; the DIY, good-things-come-to-those-who-wait — or plant —  approach sends a positive message. One that, hopefully, will supplant the constant, toxic messages that tell us — to a catchy tune  —   to blow our money on booze because we're nobody outside a bar. 

Learn more about Common Ground Community Garden at www.crestviewcommunitygarden.org.

What's your view? Write a letter to the editor or tweet News Bulletin Editor Thomas Boni @cnbeditor.

This article originally appeared on Crestview News Bulletin: EDITOR'S DESK: Crestview community garden promotes much more than farming